Tuesday, April 29, 2014

Opinions and Catharsis - Intellectual Vomit All Over Your Comfiest Shirt

Here I find myself on the soapbox again.  Dammit all to hell, I hate heights.  Here are my list of complaints and my excellent opinions to back them up.

1.  Retiree Roadblock:  This one is certain to seal my fate as a bad young driver and a worse geriatric driver.  Fuck you, Karma.  Imma go all Grand Theft Auto.  (Not really.  I'm sorry, Karma. I totally didn't mean it.)  I can't stand driving amongst a population that is well into its golden years.  (I'm bound to make enemies on this one.)  If you drive 5-10 miles under the speed limit, STAY RIGHT, for the love of Pete, Jesus and all that is.  We don't want to go around your old ass when we're late leaving Point A and pissed about how long it will take us to reach Point B.  If you drive more than ten miles under, stay home!  I will run your errands for you.  It would be faster than being stuck behind you.


2.  The method of execution for those convicted and sentenced to death:  It has been a recent topic of hot debate.  Obviously, this topic has more gravity than the previous one.  I have been reading about recent protests regarding the method of execution for convicted murderers who have been sentenced to die.  Ok, I don't relish the thought of my own death.  I have too much to do, so I suppose I'll never die.  I doubt many of us do (if you do, please get help), but I've also not ever killed anyone.  I've wondered many times why convicted murderers, those deemed beyond morality by a "juror of their peers" is allowed to continue living and even to expect a humane death when they have inflicted such pain on another.  I imagine in a certain trailer a number of years ago, a certain young victim would have prayed for the mercy of a botched lethal injection.  Yet, these "people" who show such a disregard for life and humanity, have had their day in the sun declaring that lethal injection is inhumane.  Maybe we should just beat them to death with hammers instead?  After all, they've squawked, nay SCREAMED, about their rights.  As far as I am concerned,  unless you killed someone in self defense, your rights as a human being end the minute you confiscate the life of another.  You are both murdered in that instant.

3.  Minimum Wage Increase:  For details, see my earlier entry  http://whatelainasays.blogspot.com/2014/02/minimum-wage-increases-will-eat-your.html
Wtf, y'all?  It's only gonna help until the rest of your 99 cent menu rolls into $1.49, and your $1.49 stuff now costs $1.99.

4.  The fact that I've become a Republican capitalist:  FML, how did this happen?  In an instant, I go from almost socialist do downright deplorable.  Big government with lots of well intended, yet shockingly easy to abuse assistance programs, is much of the problem in my opinion of admittedly   This is the last I have to say on the subject, actually, unless you ask me true, Capt. Jack Elliot.

5.  There are no jobs:  This one ties into #4 and #5.  Jobs, apparently, have become the stuff of legend.  Like unicorns, they are only a pretty imagining.  The fact is that I've employed several people in the last few years.  Granted, I haven't employed as many as Wal-Mart (thank our lucky stars every day that I'm not Wal-Mart), but I have employed some.  There are jobs out there, y'all, and it's been my observation that people don't actually want jobs, though.  How silly.  They want checks.  Obviously, I don't speak for you all.  If you're offended right now, you're either hella guilty of being a lazy ass or you're truly down on your luck.  If you're the former, this opinion is aimed straight at you, asshole.  Be fucking employable.  Don't sit at home and wonder how your drug habit or your "Murderer" neck tattoo screwed you over.  Put on a turtleneck.  Get clean.  Go fill out applications, quit interviewing like a dumbass (and worse, not even showing up for interviews), and life is bound to turn around.

You sure are, honey.  And you're speshul too.


That concludes our episode of "I'm Desiring to Piss Everyone Off on a Global Scale".  Next up, "Parenting Against the Masses"